You've locked a date. Relatives start asking about the card. Friends want to know whether they should hold the weekend. The practical question is when to send save the dates, and it isn't as mysterious as it feels.
For a local wedding, mail them 6 to 8 months before the day. Destination, holiday weekend, or peak season? Stretch that to 8 to 12 months so people can book travel. Formal invitations follow later: 6 to 8 weeks out for most U.S. weddings, a little earlier if guests are flying in. If you're already inside four months, skip the save-the-date and go straight to the invitation.
If you've just said yes, start with the first steps after getting engaged (yes, those engagement photos can live on the card) and then choose the wedding date with travel and holidays in mind. Stationery is easier once those two things are real.
Save the Date vs Invitation: Two Different Jobs
A save-the-date and an invitation are not two versions of the same piece. They do two different jobs.
The save-the-date holds the weekend. It says, please keep this day free. The invitation is the actual ask. Time, place, dress, how to reply. One is a courtesy. The other is the request to come.
That distinction matters more than paper stock. Emily Post is firm on this: anyone who receives a save-the-date must receive an invitation. If you're not sure they will be invited, they do not get the early card. I've watched a couple mail a pretty magnet to a coworker they later cut. It's an awkward conversation you can simply not have.
So the guest list has to be real before you print. Not every cousin spelled perfectly. Real enough that you wouldn't take a name off without a serious reason. Plus-ones you've already decided to include belong on the envelope now, not as a surprise on the invitation.
The two pieces don't have to match. A photo postcard can lead a letterpress suite. A magnet can lead a website RSVP. Guests will not audit your stationery. They will notice if the names on the envelope don't match who is welcome on the day.
When to Send Save the Dates
Here is the timing I use, and it lines up with The Knot's save-the-date etiquette.
| Wedding type | Save the dates | Invitations |
|---|---|---|
| Local / most U.S. weddings | 6–8 months before | 6–8 weeks before |
| Destination, holiday, or peak season | 8–12 months before | 8–10 weeks before |
| Guests traveling from overseas | 8–12 months before | 9–10 weeks before |
| Under about 4 months out | Skip the save-the-date | As soon as you are ready (ideally 6–8 weeks) |
Those months exist because people book flights, request time off, and hold weekends for other weddings. A save-the-date is useful only while those decisions are still open. Mail it while the calendar is still negotiable.
Too early is its own problem. More than about 12 months out, the card gets lost on the fridge, the date still feels hypothetical, or you change cities. I'd rather you wait until the day is truly locked than send a beautiful card you have to walk back.
Too late is simpler. Under about four months, a save-the-date just delays the information people actually need. Skip it. Send invitations.
That is when to send save the dates for a typical Saturday in your own city: 6 to 8 months, then invitations in the 6-to-8-week window. Destination and weekday weddings need a longer runway, which is the next part.
Destination weddings, weekdays, and holiday weekends
If guests need flights, hotel blocks, passports, or a Thursday off work, use the long end of the window. Eight to 12 months is not extra fuss. It is how adults plan travel.
A beach or seaside wedding is the classic case. People are coordinating weather, ferries, and a long weekend, not just a Saturday night in town. Peak June Saturdays, a holiday weekend, and a Friday ceremony in another city all behave the same way.
Weekday weddings surprise even devoted friends. A Tuesday in October can be gorgeous and calmer for you. It is also a workday for everyone else. Give them the 8-to-12-month heads-up so they can ask for the day without scrambling.
If a share of your list is coming from overseas, treat the whole wedding like a destination event even if you're getting married at home. Those guests need the long save-the-date window and a longer invitation window later.
If the venue is not booked yet
You can still mail a save-the-date. City and date are enough.
"Brooklyn, New York" or "Sonoma County" plus the full date with the year, and a quiet "invitation to follow," does the job. Don't wait for the ballroom name. Don't wait for the exact ceremony hour. The hour belongs on the invitation, and venues shift.
Don't print a venue you haven't booked. If the date is still a maybe, wait.
What to Include on a Save the Date (and How to Word It)
Keep the card short. People need four things, clearly: your names, the full date with the year, the city or region, and some version of "invitation to follow." That last line tells guests this is not the RSVP piece.
Nice to have: a photo you actually like, and a wedding website if it is live. The site is useful for hotels and a rough plan of the weekend.
Leave off the rest. Registry. Dress code. Exact ceremony time. A speech about no kids. Gift language of any kind. And no RSVP. I mean it. If you put a reply on it, half the list will think they have already answered, and your invitation RSVP will be a mess.
Save the date wording can be almost plain. Fancy calligraphy does not require fancy sentences. Two versions I use constantly:
We're getting married. Please save Saturday, June 13, 2027, in Charleston, South Carolina. Invitation to follow.
Maya and James. Sunday, October 4, 2027. Napa Valley. Formal invitation to follow. mayaandjames.com
Names, date with year, place, and the follow-up line. That's the whole assignment. If you want a line of warmth ("we can't wait to celebrate with you"), keep it to one.
A note on photos: use one you both like at wallet size. That's how most people will see it, on a fridge. Engagement portraits work. A crowded group shot doesn't, because nobody can tell who is getting married.
How to Address Save the Dates
The envelope is the invitation in miniature. Whoever is named is who is invited. If you write "The Ramirez Family," you've invited the household. If you write "Jordan Ramirez and Guest," you've invited a plus-one. If you write only "Jordan Ramirez," you haven't.
Be as specific as you can. Children's names belong on the envelope if they are welcome. Outer envelopes can stay a little more formal. Inner envelopes, if you're using them, can name everyone. For the fiddly cases (married couples with different last names, plus-ones you know, families with older kids), Minted's envelope etiquette guide is the practical cheat sheet I send couples when they get stuck.
Spell the names the way people actually use them. Don't guess at a married name. Don't address a couple as "Mr. and Mrs. His Full Name" if you know she kept hers. And don't put "and Family" if you haven't decided about kids.
How to address save the dates is really a guest-list question. If the list is honest, the envelopes are easy. If you're still negotiating with parents about cousins, wait.
When to Send Wedding Invitations
Invitations come later than people think. The save-the-date already held the weekend. This piece has the details.
For most local weddings, when to send wedding invitations is 6 to 8 weeks before the day. Paper RSVP cards need the longer end, closer to 8 weeks, because mail has to go out and come back. Digital RSVPs can work at 6 weeks. Guests traveling from overseas should get the invitation 9 to 10 weeks out. Destination and holiday weddings sit at 8 to 10 weeks.
The Knot's invitation timing matches that window, and adds a wrinkle for couples who skipped the early card. If you never sent save-the-dates on a short engagement, aim for around 3 months before. If you skipped them on a long engagement, closer to 6 months. I still like 6 to 8 weeks as the default when you did send the early card.
When to send out wedding invitations is also a printing question. Order the suite about 12 to 14 weeks before the wedding, so you have time for proofs and a misspelled middle name.
Set the RSVP date about 3 to 4 weeks before the wedding. That's enough time to chase stragglers, give the caterer a number, and build a day-of timeline that isn't based on hope.
Emily Post's wedding planning checklist still puts invitations in the mail 6 to 8 weeks prior. The manners hold even if the suite is yours. A passport-style invitation can be a charming design choice for a destination day, as long as it still carries who, when, where, and how to reply.
If you're inside four months with no save-the-date in the world, don't manufacture one. Finish the invitation and mail it. Guests would rather have the real information than a second piece of paper that says "more later."
Printed, Digital, and Getting Them in the Mail
Paper still earns its keep, because the whole point is to live on a fridge. Digital is fine for a last-minute local wedding or a very small list. If you go digital, send it from a real address and follow up with anyone who never opens it.
Magnets are beloved and slightly annoying to mail. They cost more to post, and they should go in an envelope, not naked into the stream. Square cards and anything unusually thick get non-machinable pricing. As of mid-2026, USPS First-Class Mail starts around $0.82 for letters, $0.65 for postcards, and $1.31 for square or unusual pieces. Check current postage before you buy stamps, because those numbers move.
Ask a clerk to hand-cancel the box. Don't dump the box in a mailbox and hope. Hand-canceling is gentler on letterpress, foil, and ribbon. Take the finished, stamped stack to the counter.
FAQ
When do you send out save the dates?
For a local wedding, 6 to 8 months before the day. For destination, holiday, or peak-season dates, 8 to 12 months. If you're already under about four months, don't send one. Go to invitations.
Do we still send invitations if everyone already has the date?
Yes. The save-the-date held the weekend. The invitation asks people to come and tells them how. Time, place, dress, and RSVP live there, not on the early card.
Who has to get a save-the-date?
Anyone you're certain you will invite, and nobody you might cut. Everyone who receives a save-the-date must receive an invitation. Officiants, the wedding party, and out-of-town family usually go on the first list. Work acquaintances you're still debating do not.
What if we skipped save-the-dates entirely?
That's allowed, and common on a short engagement. Send invitations as soon as they are ready, ideally 6 to 8 weeks before. The Knot's version is about 3 months out if the engagement was short, and about 6 months if it was long and you never mailed the early card.
Can the save-the-date go out before we have a venue?
Yes, if the date and the city are real. Print the region and the full date with the year, plus "invitation to follow." Leave the venue name and the ceremony time for the invitation. Modern wedding etiquette still prefers a true date over a pretty guess.
The first public gesture of the day
A save-the-date is the first thing most people will hold of your wedding. Keep it kind, keep it true, and mail it while the calendar can still move. Then let the invitation do the rest.
The card isn't the marriage. It's a date on a fridge, a small promise that the day is coming, and that you want them there when it does.