A Bride's Guide to Finding the Perfect Wedding Dress
Every bride dreams of finding that perfect wedding dress - the one that makes her feel like a princess while still being comfortable enough to dance the night away. But between navigating budget constraints, appointments, and opinions from well-meaning friends and family, shopping for the dress can also be one of the most stressful parts of wedding planning.
I distinctly remember the mix of excitement and anxiety when it came time for me to go searching for my bridal gown. I had been dreaming of THE dress since I was a little girl, but suddenly faced with what felt like endless options, I quickly became overwhelmed. After several tearful appointments and near meltdowns in the fitting room, I finally found a gown that checked all of my boxes - it made me feel beautiful, fit my venue and budget, and was ultra comfortable so I could party on the dance floor.
Finding your dream dress is absolutely possible if you go into the process with the right mindset and strategy. This guide will walk you through the top things to keep in mind when searching for your wedding dress. With some savvy shopping skills and a sense of perspective, you'll be able to look and feel your best down the aisle and have an absolute blast celebrating in your gown!
Set Your Budget
Before you even start searching for dresses, it's important to set a realistic budget. Wedding dresses can vary wildly in price, with the average cost being around $1,500 in the US. However designer dresses can quickly skyrocket into the multiple thousands.
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Do some research ahead of time on the average costs of dresses in your style, fabric, and from designers you like. Sites like The Knot and WeddingWire publish annual wedding dress budget statistics that can help give you an idea of price ranges.
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Make sure to factor in additional expenses such as sales tax, alterations, veil/accessories, preservation, and even overages. It's always better to estimate expenses on the higher side so you don't end up going over budget if unexpected costs come up.
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Build in some wiggle room if you can for flexibility. You don't want to find your dream dress that exceeds your budget by $200 and not be able to work with it. Likewise, you may fall in love with one that is under budget, and that gives you more room to splurge on accessories or reception outfit.
Setting expectations around what you can reasonably afford will help you zero in on dresses in your range. You want to find something you love while being financially responsible at the same time. Don't break the bank for the dress if you'll be stressed about paying for it later!
Start Your Search Early
Once you've set your budget, start researching salons and booking appointments. Ideally you'll want to start your dress search 6-12 months before your wedding date.
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Popular salons and designers can book up quickly - especially on weekends - so you'll want to schedule appointments several months in advance to ensure you get a good selection of time slots.
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Starting your search early also gives you plenty of time to find the dress if you don't find "the one" right away. You can search multiple salons as well as explore custom designers.
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If you fall in love with a dress that needs to be specially ordered due to sizing or customization, early booking will ensure the dress arrives in time for alterations and your wedding day. Rush orders can incur extra fees.
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Taking the time to find your dress over several months can help prevent last minute stress and panic if you don't have luck at first. You don't want to end up having to compromise on a dress you don't love just because you're running out of time.
While it may seem early at first, give yourself around 6-12 months for the process. Finding the perfect dress takes time, and you'll want to be able to relax and enjoy searching for it!
Stay Open Minded
It's so easy to fall in love with a style you see on Pinterest or on a celebrity. However, going into appointments with a fixed idea of your dream dress can really limit your options. The silhouette and styles that look gorgeous on a model may not be the most flattering for your own body type.
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Try on a wide variety of silhouettes, necklines, sleeves, and fabrics. Even if you were dead set on a mermaid style, you may be surprised to find a sheath or A-line is much more flattering on your frame.
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Focus less on the actual look, and more about how the dress makes you feel when you put it on. Does it make you feel confident, elegant, like the best version of yourself? That’s way more important than whether it matches your Pinterest board.
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If you don't have that initial emotional response to any dress you try on, don't get discouraged! It sometimes takes a while to get used to seeing yourself in a wedding dress, and the more keep an open mind the more likely you'll have that a-ha moment.
Remaining open to different styles than you originally imagined will really expand your options. You may just find a dress you never knew you wanted is actually the perfect one! Let each dress shine on its own merit.
Prioritize Comfort
No matter how gorgeous a dress looks, if you can't comfortably sit, walk, dance, and move around in it, you'll likely end up frustrated and uncomfortable on your wedding day. You want to be able to fully celebrate and enjoy yourself at your wedding, not be restricted by a heavy or ill-fitting dress.
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Move around in dresses you try on - walk, do a little spin, sit down, bend over. Make sure you'll have the mobility you need for the day.
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Pay attention to potential rubbing spots or areas that pinch or dig in. Those will only get more irritated as the day goes on.
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Try heavier dresses on longer to make sure they don't cause strain on your back or shoulders. You'll likely be wearing your dress for 8+ hours when all is said and done.
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Consider how easy a dress will be to go to the bathroom in! Look for easy access zippers and buttons.
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Flowy skirts and minimal trains will be much easier to dance and move around in than mermaid gowns or extra long trains.
Don't get so caught up in how a dress looks that you ignore how it feels - comfort really is key for a dress you'll wear all day! Make that a priority in your selection.
Consider Your Venue
Your wedding venue can influence various aspects of your dress selection - from formality and fabric to accessories and weather readiness. Make sure to keep venue details in mind as you shop.
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Match the formality level of your dress to your ceremony and reception locations. A ball gown may look out of place at a backyard barn wedding, while a short casual dress won't work at a formal church ceremony.
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Consider the fabric and construction of dresses with your locations in mind - a heavy beaded dress could get damaged on grass or a dirt path, while a flowy chiffon gown could easily get blown around at a beach.
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Pay attention to the lighting at your venue - brightly lit spaces show more detail and color vs. dimly lit ballrooms. Make sure details and decorative aspects of dresses will be visible.
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For outdoor weddings, consider dresses with built in trains or sleeves. You'll also want to prepare for unpredictable weather with removable shawls/jackets or arrangements to bustle long trains.
Thinking through venue suitability as you search for your dress will ensure you pick something perfect for the spaces you're using. You'll be able to select a gown that fits the vibe and enhances your experience at your wedding locations.
Bring Reinforcements
While you'll ultimately make the final decision on your dress, it can be incredibly helpful to bring some key people along to appointments to provide feedback. But limit your entourage to only your very closest family and friends to keep things focused. Too many opinions can make an already stressful experience even more overwhelming!
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Bring no more than 1-2 close loved ones like your mom, future mother-in-law, sister, or best friend. They know your style and can give you an honest yet tactful opinion.
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Make sure whoever you bring will be patient, supportive, and keep an open mind to styles you're interested in. not just their ideal dress for you.
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Ask them to take photos and videos from all angles so you can see details you may miss in the mirror. Get their true first impressions on each dress.
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If you're on the fence about a dress, pay attention to their reactions and feedback. Sometimes they'll point out things you can't see yourself when you're in it.
Having a tight knit team there will not only provide helpful perspectives, but give you some moral support through the ups and downs of appointments! Just be ready to stand your ground if they love a dress you don't connect with.
Trust Your Instinct
With so many opinions swirling around about what the "perfect" dress looks like, it's easy to start second guessing yourself. But at the end of the day, the most important thing is that YOU love your dress and feel your absolute best in it. If a dress gives you that spark and excitement when you put it on, trust that instinct!
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When the right dress comes along, you'll know it. Don't doubt the dress that you have an immediate emotional reaction to and can't stop staring at yourself in.
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Go with the dress you can't stop thinking about after the appointment, rather than the one everyone else raved about. You should feel as happy taking it off as you did putting it on.
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Focus less on idealized expectations, and more about how the dress makes you feel about yourself as a bride. Does it reflect your style? Do you feel like the best version of you?
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This is YOUR day - take others opinions into account, but don't feel pressured choose a dress you don't love. Find the one that makes YOU excited to walk down the aisle.
At the end of the day, weddings are about marrying the love of your life - not the perfect dress. If you feel gorgeous and like yourself, that's what matters most. Trust that instinctual feeling when you find “the one”!
Other Tips
Here are a few other helpful things to keep in mind as you search for your dress:
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Allow extra time and budget for tailoring. Even if a dress fits well off the rack, you'll likely need minor alterations for the perfect fit. Factor in time for at least 2 alteration appointments.
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Take photos and videos during appointments to compare details of dresses side by side later on. It's hard to remember subtleties across multiple appointments.
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Don't feel pressured to commit to a dress on the first appointment. Give yourself time to see other options and "sleep on it" before making a decision.
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Ask about the shop's policies -Are deposits refundable? When do dresses arrive if ordered? What are alteration costs? Understanding these details are key.
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Get swatches of colors if you want a specific shade for bridesmaids. Colors often look different in person than online.
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Preserve your dress after the wedding to protect the investment. You may want to pass it down someday!
Doing some savvy prep work and research up front will ensure the dress search process goes smoothly. You want to be able to enjoy this special time, not feel stressed!
Conclusion
Finding the perfect wedding dress can feel like an incredibly daunting task, but breaking the process down step by step makes it much more manageable. By setting your budget, giving yourself adequate time to search, keeping an open mind, prioritizing comfort, and trusting your instincts, you'll be able to find your dream dress.
Remember that at the end of the day, your wedding is about you and your partner - not a dress. If you feel beautiful, comfortable, and authentically yourself on the big day, that's what matters. Approach the dress search with patience and perspective. Before you know it, you'll have that magical moment saying yes to the dress! Keep an eye on the prize - soon you'll be walking down the aisle toward your future spouse looking and feeling your amazing best.